beg him

plea for love

seek absolution in a smile

a touch

a glance

I've been avoiding him you know

he put our song on his answering machine

"I wanna girl I don't have to love"

and the lyrics play over and over in my head

this is simple obession

this is manic love

I tell myself that it to will pass

then it doesn't

the bible says that there will be much sorrow in the night, and that joy comes in the morning

and he has left me

waiting for the sun

shit, can't we just fuck like we used to?

can't I just toss him down, and shove him in

things were so much simpler in bed

need and need

in and out

I woke up in a pool of blood

I carry for shorter times now

babies die in me

they flee my body

they know that no matter how much I want them

I'm too fuct up to have them

and then god laughs

I see Mary and she is crying blood

the dreams won't stop

and this life won't start

I told a friend of mine today

that I had to shake this nasty desperation

it didn't match my outfit

he laughed

I am so alone.

-adipose

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